Often what we really feel can be hidden under layers of self-protection, fear, and doubts. However, when we seek to ask ourselves questions and choose to problem solve, we won't just brush things aside but will be able to discern what's going on, on the inside of us and how we can move forward positively.
One technique to help us become more self-aware, discover what we want and feel, and deal with any issues we face is the "five whys" technique.
Begin asking the 5 Why's by:
1. Defining the problem and focusing your answer to address the issue as specifically as possible. Don't settle for the obvious, but dig a little deeper into how you are feeling, and what's causing you to feel that way. Are you being triggered because of a past experience or hurt, do you need to let something go, forgive or choose to look at a situation differently?
2. Keep asking why so that the root cause can be revealed. Take time to examine your heart and thoughts, to pray and to be honest with yourself.
3. Ask why to how you responded to the previous question and repeat this five times, digging a little deeper every time you question why you are feeling and thinking a particular way and what answer you arrive at so that more than the surface aspects of what you are feeling and facing can be looked at.
4. Write down or draw in pictures your answers, and feelings. Being able to articulate in writing your answers gets it out of your head and makes you examine your thoughts and emotions strategically, rather than going round and round in circles.
5. Problem solve – what can you do, change, let go of and address?
Do you need help, or to talk it out with another person? What strategy can you implement to be able to move ahead?
Don't get stuck finding yourself in the same position in your relationships and circumstances. Ask why and then seek God's help as you what steps to take, how to address any problems, or hurts from the past and then make plans to move forward.
"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting." (Psalm 139:23-24)
"If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." (James 1:5)
Prayer: Lord, please help me be honest about my feelings and show me the answers to my Why questions. Show me what the root cause of any issues I am facing is and lead me in the way to go today. In Jesus name Amen.